Bolts destroy Canes 6-1

On Wednesday, The City of Tampa Lightning thoroughly destroyed the Hurricanes. The final tally was 6-1, but it may well have been 4000-0. Carolina was awful, and Tampa didn't go easy on them.

After controlling the first period but failing to score a goal, Carolina didn't even show up for the second period. The Lightning scored five goals in the second frame, putting the game well out of reach after the third one. It was clear that nobody showed up except Justin Williams and Jeff Hamilton.

In 1980, the fictional band Spinal Tap released an album entitled "Shark Sandwich". It was famously given a two word review:

Shit Sandwich

Whenever the Hurricanes play a game like tonight's, in which they get utterly and thoroughly destroyed in every way, I'm tempted to give the game that same two word review.

Adding to the debacle that was the scoreboard, Craig Adams got beaten into a bloody pulp in a fight with Doug Janik (who played with Buffalo in The Year of The Cup). With just a few minutes to play, the two squared off, and when it was all done, CrAdams was bleeding profusely from his head.

Added to that, Bret Hediguchi was struck in the jaw by a puck late in the first period. He played a little bit in the second period, but he and his swollen face sat out the whole third period.

Johnny Crackers was awful. This was his first start in Tampa since leaving the team after the '06 season. He had a well-publicized row with coach Torts, and this was his opportunity to get back at him. Instead, he and his team laid a big fat stinking turd. Peter Laviolette didn't pull him, deciding to leave him out there, "dancing with the one who brung him". One goal was soft, he was way out of position on another, and he just looked bad. In all, he gave up six goals on 28 shots. That's an abysmal save % of .786.

Of course his teammates played like crap in front of him, so he doesn't deserve all of the blame. However, Johan Holmqvist looked like the old Martin Brodeur while Johnny Crackers looked like the new M-A Fleury.

From a Hurricanes perspective, there is nothing positive that can be said about this game. Except that it's over.

I imagine the boys will have a long, silent flight home. I imagine that they'll have a bag skate tomorrow. I imagine they'll play angrily on Friday against the Thrashers.

Vinny "The Horseman" Lacavalier recorded a hat trick and had the game-winning goal. Paul Ranger, Marty St. Louis and Vaclav Prospal (who I refuse to call "Vinny") also tallied goals for the home team.

Jeff "Alexander" Hamilton scored Carolina's only goal on a play where Chad "Sharpie" LaRose deserves all the credit.

This as in-depth as I will get about this stinker of a game.

The RBH three stars are as follows:
THIRD STAR Martin St. Louis, TBL --- 1 goal, 2 assists
SECOND STAR Johan Holmqvist, TBL --- 27 saves, win
FIRST STAR Vincent Lacavalier, TBL --- 3 goals (including GWG), 2 assists